I have nothing to share to you but only my truth. For in this truth I have found my precious love!!!

In the early years of my married life God already made it clear to me, that the reason of my marriage is so that I may know, how it is to be married to my Lord, Jesus Christ.  It is a taste of eternity and an understanding of how Jesus loves his church.

I’m married to a man who has so many past and experiences, too decent and cultured compared to the life I was brought up with.  Our age are 4 generations apart, thus we also have cultural differences. Though he was born and raised in the country where I was born, but because of his profession as an international entertainer, he traveled the world so many times and he learned to embrace the beauty of each nation’s culture he visited, which made him a totally different person from the rest. He learned about life by experience, as I am now.

With a vast difference in our upbringing, we learned to love each other in a very unique way.  Everyday is a “learning in process”.  It seems like two nations becoming one and two languages producing one unique utterance. With this I understood how Jesus brought 2 nations together to be one in him, both jew and gentile though completely different in many ways but grafted together in love to one messiah Jesus (Yeshua), as me and dale are grated in love to our lord Jesus Christ as well.

To tell you honestly, had it not because of our faith and love to our Lord, we could have been separated long time ago.  But the love we have is a result of God’s love for us.  We experienced so many miracles and divine interventions in our very intricate relationship.  We walk hand in hand, traveling the unknown future with Jesus binding our hands and our hearts together to victory. Truly, unless the Lord builds the house the laborers are in vain.

I’m a product of a failed marriage and so as dale. And we exactly know how it feels to live in a broken home.  It was not a very nice feeling.  Many times in my youth, i wish to be pampered and taken cared for but because of our situation i could not find it from anyone.  I yearn and long for love and hoping that I could find it elsewhere.  I journeyed life alone with resentment to my father for not giving me the care and the love that every child deserves.  I resented my mother for leaving us to be nurtured by somebody else. I tried to be good but no one seems to care. i tried to be bad but no one seems to bother.  At an early age, I learned how to think like an adult hoping that i could seal up the emptiness in my heart. I learned things in advance compared to people of my age.  Not because i want to but because I have to. 

Now, looking back to all these, I realized how God protected me all this time.  I was an easy prey to any hungry predator.  But I praised God that he never allowed me to experience to succumb in dark world of “alternatives”.  I remember, when i was 5 years old, before their separation, my mother told me that life is not that easy, so she taught me how to pray to Jesus, not by prayer book or memorized prayers but how to pray from the heart.  She told me to talk to Jesus the same way as I would talk to her, and I did.

One year later, they got separated and i had someone to stand as my mother. My father had a hard time convincing me to accept this new phase of our lives.  I hated it. I want my mother.  This went on and on and resulted to more heated argument between me and my father. I suffered from his unrelenting beating and harsh words.  I even thought that i was not his daughter because in my young mind i had a picture of a loving father who would never take courage to hurt his offspring.  That pain i carried in my heart for a long time.  I searched for love that i could never find at home.  Then i remembered what my mother told me.  I prayed to Jesus.  and because of this i was able to get out from that ordeal.

If there’s one thing that I’m positive about, is the truth that my prayer saved me from evil ways of life.  I’m not perfect and no one is.  But as i develop my prayer life i discovered that there is more to it than asking and petition and that is, relationship.  In my prayer Jesus shared his life to me.  He showed me things that truly mesmerized me.  In my prayer I felt his love. the true love that I longed to see. In my prayer, Jesus revealed himself that made me keep on asking for more.  My relationship with my Lord is really something personal.  Too personal that no on could question.  The same way, my love for my husband is a surprise to everybody but at the same time no one dares to question.